As 2011 draws to a close, I find myself reviewing my year — my hopes, my dreams, my desires. Were they met?
Some were and some weren’t.
Now I think: Did I really want what I thought I wanted? Did I work at it, or did I just put it on another list?
Taking stock of what I accomplished — and didn’t — helps me acknowledge how far I’ve strayed from what is MOST important to me. In my look-back, I find I put my own deepest desires on the back burner to help others accomplish what it is they wanted to do. Yes, it may have been a worthwhile project, but it wasn’t mine.
I look back another year and ask myself why I’m a bit down, searching for the truth of what went wrong. What I find is my own procrastination and lack of appropriate prioritization prevented me from pursuing my deepest desires.
I won’t let it get me down…like this sunrise picture in Tioga, each day holds 24 hours’ promise. It’s what I do with that promise that leads to my accomplishment — or not — of my personal ambitions.
So as 2011 draws to a close, I agree to close the door on past practices of procrastination for the things that matter most to me — enjoying the beauty of nature, outdoor activity and inspirational writing.
Today is the only day I can do anything that matters, so today I close the chapter of the past and live in the present, finding contentment in the moments that mean the most to me.
How about you?
Great post, Kathy. I too found myself asking these questions recently, not for New Year's, but when recovering from my triple ankle fracture. I looked at the intense life I'd led and asked, do I really want all of that back? It was all good, and all fed me in one way or another, but was it distracting my number one goal of getting my fiction published, or feeding it? I decided to keep my eye on the prize, and started saying no to a few things. Suspended blogging for a spell so I could re-dedicate myself to my book-length writing. Everything snowballed from there and I soon found my agent–as if the universe were waiting for me to prioritize! My take-away: we can't have it all, nor should we want to. But maybe we can have that which we pour our soul energy into obtaining.
Well Kathy I agree with you. It has also been so easy for me to forget about me and help others instead. This has been an ingrained habit from childhood. Damn girl scouts….hahha
Well all I know is today is a new day and it only takes 21 days to set in a new habit… May Divine Guidance Bless you and I and all on this path in 2012, and help us catch ourselves from deviating from the course….
Love Suzie
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Kathryn & Suzie: Thanks for the good thoughts!